I love irony–in fact, my highly advanced brain can more or less only function on the ironic level or else I’d slip into some sort of Camus fueled existential coma. That said, sometimes irony makes me really fucking mad. Like this week’s wow.com abortion. Here’s a fuckin’ link. Just be clear at the outset: I feel uniquely qualified to comment on the abilities of our new friend, since he and  I play the same class. That’s why I am fairly comfortable saying that there’s a pretty fair chance he’s the stupidest person on the entire fucking internet.

I honestly reserved judgment on our new UI moron, but I can’t believe he’s saying some of this shit after he posted his own garbage dump of a user interface. What’s worse, he somehow thinks that his UI approximates a “good” UI experience and instead of taking his own advice and critically fucking evaluating his own UI, he non-ironically tries to give advice to other people. The uncanny nature of his non-ironic irony is like unfuckingbelievable.

Section One: oPie

Motherfucker is talking about fucking opie when he has his MOTHERFUCKING AURAS ON HIS FUCKING ACTION BAR! What the fuck? You have to be in the 1st percentile on a fucking “living/breathing functionality exam” to not know what fucking aura you have up. You oPie your auras because you don’t need every fucking button on your screen at once you ignorant cocksucker.The fuck gives you the right to tell anyone anything when you obviously don’t understand the implications of what you’re saying. It’s like having the fattest fucking person on the planet scream in your ear because you ate a cheeseburger all while the fat idiot is having lard pumped directly into his veins.

Section Two: Action Bars

Look at his original screenshot. At one point I’d gone through and made a graphic showing every ability that should be hidden, but I closed photoshop before I saved it and then lost interest. Like more than 50% of his visible buttons should either (a) be on hover-over bars or (b) be left in a fucking spell book. Don’t even play around with action bars when you don’t know the first thing about prioritizing spaces on your fucking UI. This mouthbreather probably couldn’t contemplate a world without his cooking button on his action bars! WHY IS HE GIVING ADVICE TO ANYONE ON ANY SUBJECT?!

Section Three: Simpler Unit Frames!

Don’t worry, he has his own name visible on his unit frames and his own level! I don’t think I need to say much more than this. I’ve lost steam and don’t want to comment on the rest because it just makes me shake with anger. I mean it doesn’t really do that, but I just find it offensive. It offends me that someone like him believes that he should tell people anything about anything when he’s clearly an ignorant idiot. It offends me that the people running wow.com are so vapid that they don’t seem to care that their website viciously promotes stupidity by running such unbelievably insipid columns.

I’m offended.

UPDATE:

Let me just give you this gem from the comments. Reading shit like this honestly makes me angry:

Just wanted to give you some positive feedback Matt. This was an excellent article, showed me a few new things (I consider myself a bit of a UI pro), and was extremely useful for everyone to the newbies out there to the old school high end types. I’d seen Opie but did not know that it could be used to hide elements of the UI that you didn’t need at the moment… thanks for the intro to it.

Taeo has started a new website where you can post, view, and rate user interface screenshots. It’s kind of like how Discord was 900 years ago before the dinosaurs raped monkeys into humans or whatever happened back then.

http://www.wowuigallery.com/

The new UI dude at WoW.com posted something. It wasn’t unintelligible garbage, at least it didn’t appear that way at first glance. I’ll read it when I’m not so sleepy tomorrow. http://www.wow.com/2010/02/09/reader-ui-of-the-week-your-addon-ui-columnist/

Is this Caith or NotCaith?

Your DPS is miserable–embarrassingly bad. My e-celebrity, like a super nova, shined brightly enough to draw the attention of one young warlock. Unfortunately, just like staring directly into a solar eclipse, he was blinded by my genius. I know my perfection was partly to blame for his failure, and as such felt the need to publicly humiliate him.

He had a good idea for a post, and was very nice! I love talking to people who read omgphatloots–and I’m confident that my massive ret paladin DPS can make up for their ego massaging whispers.

<3 Braklock

It looks like WoW.com is trying their hand at a UI column again!

AddOn: Writing about AddOns is tricky business. You need to take something dry and technical and transform it into something accessible and entertaining to read. And no one approached it with more enthusiasm and flair than Mathew McCurley. Once he gets AddOn Spotlight back on track, he’ll be tackling Reader UI of the Week and few more of the crazier ideas he had.

I don’t know who Mathew McCurley is, but the fact that his qualifications are “enthusiasm and flair” does not bode well, dear reader.

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If other, post which addon you use in the comments!

DOWNLOAD LINK ZOMG!

Thank the lord on high that No Stock UI has stopped trying to post about and analyze UIs at all. It’s now just like “Hey bro, here’s an addon and a 900 page post about it.” Pretty good stuff.

If you do one thing before Christmas it should be to install Shadowed’s new mod that makes your screen have snowflakes everywhere. Then take a screenshot of your UI and post it on the forums! It’ll add some nice holiday cheer to the otherwise soul-sucking horror that is the official forum “post your UI” thread.

If you need additional incentive you should know that the 6 different snowflakes were drawn by someone who draws internet animal cartoon things (I think they’re animals, it’s not really clear). He also has a killer mustache.

Get it: http://www.wowinterface.com/downloads/info15325-LetItSnow.html

Here’s something I got from StormFX today:

For future reference, you need read the license of an add-on before copying it, modifying one image, and then uploading it as your own.

I’m not going be an ass and ask you to remove it, but you need to adhere to the license and state on the download page that your skin is a modified version of Apathy, done with permission, and that all unmodified files are still credited to myself.

Thanks.

Now, this is in reference to my Not_Caith skin. On face we can see one problem – it is not modified Apathy, it’s modified Caith. That trivial (no, it’s not) distinction aside, let’s look at Caith’s license (as accessed today at 7:15ish pm EST)

The contents of this add-on, excluding third-party resources, are copyrighted to its author with all rights reserved, under United States and international copyright law. The author of this add-on hereby grants you the following permissions:

You MAY download, install and use this add-on for your own personal use.

You MAY use code from this add-on, in whole or in part, in your own project provided that the name and code of the target project contain no references to the name of this add-on or its author.

You MAY NOT redistribute this add-on or its contents, modified or unmodified, without the express permission of its author with the following exception:

You MAY include an unmodified version of this add-on in a compilation provided that the author of this add-on is credited in both the
compilation and the download page of the compilation, and that the download page of the compilation include a hyper-link or the URL to the project or download page of this add-on.

The interesting thing is that permissions two and three are contradictory, as “code” is generally ambiguous and the question of when something is simply modified or new product is not a very clear line. While I am ultimately choosing to take down the addon (both as a punishment to the community for StormFX’s failure AND because StormFX told me I didn’t have to and I have no intention of following his advice) I will point out that the license (as written) is a fucking disaster.

If authors are interested in extending legal take-down requests, their license shouldn’t read as though it were written by a student who failed 4th grade logic.

Oh yeah I also gave StormFX credit on the download page.